Yesterday was a tough day. I thought about Marcus alot, and when I think about him, there is always the question of why in the back of my mind. Why did this happen to him? To us? Why are we left to pick up the pieces, feeling so alone? When I start questioning these things, it's easy for me to lose sight of where my focus should be. It is easier still for me to be angry, angry because I am hurting, angry because I feel let down, or betrayed. Though, it is these times, the worst of times, that God wants me to rely on Him, not myself or other people, but Him. I am reminded that God sent his only son, here, to this terrible, broken place to die, so that my son could have eternal life, completely whole, and healed. He alone knows of His plans for us, and He doesn't owe us an explanation, and one day, when I am holding my son again, I will see the bigger picture.