Party over here!

When you have a houseful of kids, the party never stops. You could have any number of things happen, like a shaved eyebrow.....

or an exploding laundry basket.....

and when things get really rowdy.....

(Please excuse my dirty window, the maid ran screaming from our house one day and we haven't seen her since)

Lucas has been telling Myles how he is so happy to have someone smaller than him to bully love.

Myles is not impressed....

It must be the hair.

Yesterday was a tough day. I thought about Marcus alot, and when I think about him, there is always the question of why in the back of my mind. Why did this happen to him? To us? Why are we left to pick up the pieces, feeling so alone? When I start questioning these things, it's easy for me to lose sight of where my focus should be. It is easier still for me to be angry, angry because I am hurting, angry because I feel let down, or betrayed. Though, it is these times, the worst of times, that God wants me to rely on Him, not myself or other people, but Him. I am reminded that God sent his only son, here, to this terrible, broken place to die, so that my son could have eternal life, completely whole, and healed. He alone knows of His plans for us, and He doesn't owe us an explanation, and one day, when I am holding my son again, I will see the bigger picture.

I think about him all the time. I still have a hard time saying his name, or looking at his pictures, and his stuff is still the same as it was when we got it from the hospital, I can't seem to do anything but move it from place to place. So it sits, in the blue Texas Children's bags, untouched, but I think about him.All.the.time. I wonder what things would have been like, what I thought they were supposed to be like, twin outfits, a triple stroller for the boys, a van full of kids. Big man,little man, and middle man, that was how I pictured it, and it is hard for me to accept that God had other plans for my middle man.Bigger plans. Better plans. God answered my prayer for healing, not according to my plan, but to His. I am thankful to serve such a loving and merciful God. I am thankful to have been chosen for such an amazing journey, as painful as it is.

I apologize for being such a blog slacker. I needed to take some time away for a bit, time to purge my home of the over abundance of crap stuff that made me feel like I was being smothered, time to focus on my children and husband, just time. Also, somehow, Lucas and Myles have teamed up and decided that when one goes down for a nap, the other should wake up for no apparent reason and stay up until right before said napping child wakes up. Which explains why jammies are standard dress around here more days than not. Last night this little pact they have extended into the wee hours of the morning, yet, they are both napping and the house is quiet so the joke's on them.
I am almost finished with building my bookcase. There may or may not have been a few wrong measurements, so the bookcase may or may not wobble like a weeble, I can't say for sure, but I can say that the math man is taking a look at it to see what he can would fix, if there was a problem.

Alarm clocks going off, being up before the sun rises, and clothing arguments can only mean one thing, school's back in session.

That means no more sneaking off with moms camera to take self portraits. Too bad, cause laughter is the best medicine.

You have to know I laughed when I saw these. Self-expression. Good for her, fun for us. Also, just in case our dentist is reading,

Nice huh? While the girls are off to school, I will be alone with this

who has learned the fine art of pulling off his diaper. Luckily, this is not my first rodeo, so we do this

because while clothing is optional, diapers are not. Also this guy

who looks scared because those chubby little hands in the corner there are always out to get him.
While we adjust to our new normal, we continue to thank everyone for their prayers and kindness. This has been the most difficult season we have ever had to face, and yet we have been overwhelmed by the love and support we have had during this time.